RR V DAY – Video Day

Tomorrow, Melanie and I begin 3 days of  filming the women’s Awaken-Love Video Series.

We are excited to finally get rolling and hear the first,


Our desire is to let go of our notes and just TEACH like we have done so many times.

We are imperfect, unpolished, ordinary women that have submitted ourselves to being used by God and we are trusting that He is going to show up.


Will you please pray for us over the next 3 days?

Blessings, Ruth and Melanie

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Intimacy and Sex as a Newlywed

Today’s guest post is by Sharelle Guyton who attended the women’s Awaken-Love study earlier this year. Sharelle shared thoughtful insights during the study and we are excited for you to read her thoughts about being a newlywed.

As a newlywed, I felt myself sort of fumbling through the principle of frequency. We are instructed to model intimacy with our husbands based on our intimacy with God. This includes our frequency of intimacy. But while single, the goal is to stray away from acting on your desires. When those two experiences collide, it feels a little confusing at first.

My husband and I are both finding that we are going through an adjustment period as it relates to frequency. I think the best way to think about sex as a newlywed is with an open mind and heart. Making a clean slate to rebuild and redefine sex based on the Word of God and the unique interaction of you and your husband. I pondered on what could be a practical method of improving this area of our intimacy.

Here the quick tips that I recently incorporated into my marriage to heighten frequency awareness.

First, Reminding myself of the importance of frequency because it models my intimate relationship with God. For example, the days I miss my prayer and study time, I am not as clear and grounded. I also feel less connected and more distracted by the world.

Second, I track the days my husband and I are intimate. For some wives this might seem like an annoyance or anxiety provoking. For me, it is an opportunity to see the truth.

Why did I start doing this?

We couldn’t remember when we were having sex but we wanted to know how often it was happening in a month. I figured the best way to get to the bottom of this mystery was document it.

By tracking the dates on my feminine phone app calendar (Pink Pad), what I realized is that we were  having sex way more often we realized! Two to three times a week but why did it feel like it was only happening twice a month!

Here’s what I learned by tracking our intimacy.

On average, how long it takes before we start feeling disconnected from one another without sex is much shorter than we assumed. Also, tracking keeps us accountable in prioritizing sex. I am also naturally a very competitive person and that works in my favor sometimes when I look at the calendar and want to increase frequency from the previous week!

If you find yourself forgetting the last time you were intimate with your husband or not sure how often sex is happening, try tracking it and see if it surprises you.

Happy Exploring!

-Sharelle Guyton

How the Awaken-Love Class Opened My Eyes to Sex God’s Way

Today’s guest post is by Sharelle Guyton who attended the women’s Awaken-Love study earlier this year. Sharelle shared thoughtful insights during the study and we are excited for you to hear some of her thoughts here as well.

My husband and I were no strangers to sex when we got married. This area of sin is something we struggled with individually before we met and exacerbated over the course of our dating relationship. During the last two years of dating, we got serious about being more obedient to God’s Word, which meant no sex or sexual activity until we got married. We were not perfect at this, but still never stopped trying.

After we got engaged, we were very curious about what sex would be like after marriage, when it was no longer  a sin. We had a very short 6-month engagement and a small intimate wedding. As we were aiming to be more like Christ, we decided that was the best way to stay focused on Him and follow through with our commitment to sexual purity.

I was blessed to be able to take the Awaken-Love class after only three months of marriage. The results of applying the insight and wisdom from the course have far exceeded my expectations and imagination!

Thinking in hindsight about the years we both struggled to defeat sexual sin, the wisdom from the course was clear how interconnected it was to our disobedience to the will of God. As I learned about using intimacy with God as a model of intimacy with my husband, it was evident I was off target with my intimacy with God as a single woman. In the same way God is a model for my sexuality married, He was also a model for my sexuality single.

What struck me about the course is that the Word of God directly informs everything we need to know about having a healthy and fulfilling sexual relationship with our husbands. The freedom that comes with the gift of understanding the goodness of God’s intention and purposes for sex are powerful.

My husband and I have experienced such healing from our past sexual sin because we know the truth of our identity in Christ. The opportunity to begin our sexual journey as a married couple with the foundation and principles of this class is something that we will use throughout the entire course of our marriage. We cannot thank you enough.

-Sharelle Guyton

We Want to Start a Revolution

We want the church – every man and woman that knows Jesus Christ as their Lord – to take back sex from the world.

We want men and women to realize the amazing power that sex has – power to destroy – but also power to make us into one.

We want men and women in the church to live as a community of believers that care about each other – even their sexuality.

We want men and women to begin a lifelong journey of growing in intimacy with their spouse that in turn brings them closer to God.

We want men and women to speak truth about God’s gift of sex – to each other, to their kids and to the lost.

We have seen God move through this blog and our speaking opportunities, however

 His greatest impacts have been witnessed through the Awaken-Love classes where marriages have been transformed when women and men gain a true understanding of what God intends for their sex life.

 This fall we want to make Awaken-Love classes available to every married woman by creating a six week interactive Awaken-Love video series and WE NEED YOUR HELP!

With the video series, women will simply invite friends into their living room to join them for an Awaken-Love study. They will learn God’s truth and design for sex. They will see God work in powerful ways as they experience healing from past baggage and freedom from lies.  Women will share respectful, encouraging conversations and learn to talk about this amazing gift of sex within marriage. They will have a new understanding of intimacy with God and with their husband.  God will change their marriage and it will be a testimony to the world.

This video study will use the same curriculum, homework, group discussions and supporting materials as our in-person classes, but the weekly teaching will come from the videos.  The videos will be formatted to provide some teaching, then prompt the women to pause the video to discuss specific questions, followed by more teaching and more discussion. No teachers needed; the study will be led by one of the women in the group serving as the facilitator. We want it to feel like Melanie and I are sitting in your living room teaching.

We constantly hear about the need for more Awaken-Love classes and have been praying about how to meet the need for months.  Then God plopped the answer right in our laps.

God has already provided opportunities for women to test the concept of video classes, an amazing videographer that desires to strengthen marriages and half of the cost for producing the video study through the generous support of my church.


We need to raise an additional $5,000.

The money raised will be used exclusively for costs associated with producing and distributing the video study.  Any money that comes into the ministry is utilized to make Awaken-Love classes available to more women.  Melanie, other teachers and I are all volunteers and do not receive any income from the ministry.

Melanie and I are filming this Awaken-Love women’s video series in early June.  The video series will be available to small groups of women by the fall of this year.

Will you consider partnering with us to make Awaken-Love available to any married woman that desires to Claim God’s Powerful Gift?

We Want to Start a Revolution!

We invite you to join us by:

  1. Praying for the Awaken-Love ministry.
  2. Praying about hosting and/or facilitating a group of women using the Awaken-Love video study in the fall.
  3. Donating funds toward the video production and distribution online or by mailing a check to Awaken-Love, P.O. Box 41624, Plymouth, MN 55441. We need to raise an additional $5,000 by the end of May.  Donations are not tax deductible, but are greatly appreciated. Every little bit helps. 

That Intimate?

I know this is kind of a stretch, but I am going to go there….

Five years ago when I studied Song of Songs as an allegory of God’s love for me, I kept thinking, “So when I am most intimate with my husband, that is what God wants with me? “ In other words, “So,  when I have an orgasm – that point in time when the rest of the world ceases to exist…when I stop worrying about what I look like, or what I sound like…. When I see my husband more clearly than my eyes are capable of seeing….when there is no wrong in the world, only us….That is what God wants with me?”


On the Edge Interview

hbg6i3q8_400x400Earlier this week, Ruth and I had the pleasure of speaking with Kenneth Mitchell over at Missions Radio on his radio show “On the Edge.”  We shared about the Awaken-Love ministry, our classes, and most importantly, we talked about God’s perfect design for sex within marriage.  Intimacy within marriage is powerfully good!  Grab your spouse or a friend and listen to the interview.


Listen In!

Ruth and I’s interview on Missions Radio has been moved to Thursday, January 21st at 10am CST.  You can go to the stations’s website to listen in or download the Live365 app on your phone and tune in to the Missions Radio channel.  We are really excited for the opportunity to share what God has done in our lives and this ministry and what an amazing gift He designed sex to be within marriage.    


Marvelous Year

Last January, I commented on Ruth’s blog asking:

Do you offer classes online? I don’t live anywhere near your church. Just curious. Thanks!

It seemed like an innocuous question. Here we are a year later – ministry partners, good friends, her husband has babysat my kids, and we’ve been on a double date.  Even though we live over 1,000 miles apart, Ruth has become a household name.  My oldest son even wrote when Ruth will visit on his pocket calendar.  God is a good, good God full of surprises.

When I contacted Ruth, what seems like lightyears ago, she had been teaching women the Awaken-Love study for three years in the Minneapolis area.  Following God’s calling, she shepherded women as they discovered God’s design for intimacy within marriage and ministered to countless other men and women through her www.christiansexclass.org blog.  When she replied to my question, asking if I would be interested in skyping into a class, I don’t think she ever dreamed that God intended for our lives to become so intertwined.  I certainly didn’t see it coming at all!


Wanted: A Man’s Perspective

The church is filled with studies to help men navigate a world that is saturated with sex and keep their eyes pure. Are there any studies to help husbands be intimate with their wife? Media and pornography are streaming images that portray techniques that work for men only. Sex is portrayed as a physical need and real intimacy, as God intended it to be, is absent. There are few messages about God’s design for sex. I believe the church needs to get involved in helping men know how to connect and love their wives in very tangible ways.


Welcome to Awaken-Love.net

Ruth BuezisI have to admit, I felt kind of lost when I clicked on christiansexclass.org and it was no longer accessible. I have been sharing there for almost two years and in a way, I left a part of myself there. Much of my writing has chronicled my personal journey, struggles and revelation about sex. I have digested what I have read, what is in alignment with God’s truth and what I have seen demonstrated to be true. I have also practiced putting words to concepts and ideas so that I can communicate them in Awaken-Love classes.  Putting words to this powerful, yet sometimes indescribable, thing we call sex is not easy.

I have also made amazing connections on christiansexclass.org.  Melanie found me and gathered up the courage to ask about taking a class – resulting in a ministry partnership that is absolutely God ordained. Women from California, Florida, Alabama, Arkansas, Texas, North Dakota, and even Nigeria are joining in on classes as we are still figuring out the best technology for communication. One young woman that was not even married yet, but already feels a call to minister in the area of Christian sexuality, emailed asking for a mentor.  God has opened door after door…

And so… this morning I prayed over christiansexclass.org.  I thanked God for every word that He gave me. I thanked him for the people that He brought – Melanie and all the others – people that I would never have crossed paths with otherwise. I thanked Him for all the people that I never met, but read some of my words, and I thanked Him for working through even my blunders.

So, without further ado…..

Welcome to Awaken-Love.net

We will continue to write about sex in God honoring ways so that husbands and wives can experience true intimacy with each other.  We will continue to point to God and His intricate design for sex that mirrors the intimacy that He wants with us. We will continue to stretch and grow as we desire to know our spouse more and to know God more.  We invite you to explore our new site!

Our desire is to raise up men and women in the church to speak truth about sex in God honoring ways, so that marriages might be strengthened. I say men and women, because we are in the beginning stages of designing a six week men’s study that will mirror the women’s Awaken-Love study. This will not be another men’s class about purity, but will be a class about how to be intimate with your wife.

We want to start a grass roots revolution that equips men and women – through our blog and our classes – to encourage each other in their sex lives so that our kids might see and know God’s truth about sex.

We are also looking for men and women that feel called to teach Awaken-Love classes. We want to disciple them, equip them and send them out – not to just teach – but to do ministry.  For there is no area of our lives that is more vulnerable than our sexuality, and it is with the greatest sensitivity and dependence on God that teachers must walk. If you feel called to minister in this area, then please contact us today.

And so this afternoon, I pray over Awaken-Love.net

God, I pray your blessings over Awaken-Love.net. I pray that you will use it as a vehicle to communicate Your truth about sex and intimacy. I pray that what we write honors you, brings glory to Your Name and helps others experience the kind of intimacy and freedom that You desire. I pray that You raise up men and women that are absolutely called to speak Your truth about sex. I pray that Christian marriages begin to look different because of the connection that we experience through sex. God, guard us from pride, guard us from going after the sparkly object, and guard us from thinking that we could accomplish anything on our own. You take us and use us – however You want.